I'm a big fan of the Tales series even if the games are frequently uneven. I'm almost always happy to play a game in the series just for the combat, but my favorite titles are those that also feature interesting character and/or plot elements. Interesting mechanics certainly help, of course. The first Tales game I ever played (and finished, early in 2006) was Tales of Symphonia for the GameCube. Not coincidentally, Symphonia is by far the most popular entry in the series. It's a great game, but I think a lot of its sales success has to do with being in the right place at the right time. It was the first fully 3D Tales title and an RPG release on a console desperate for a good RPG. Symphonia was one of three or four good RPGs on the console. Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door and Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance are also excellent--and I've heard good things about Skies of Arcadia as well (ported from the Dreamcast) but I have not personally played it even though I own it.
Tales of Symphonia introduced me to what the Tales series was about: action combat, grinding, cheesy (but charming) anime dialogue, and lots of dungeon crawling. Tales of the Abyss did not vary from this formula significantly but for whatever reason I found I enjoyed it much less. I frequently hear praise for this game but I found myself rather disliking it despite myself. The combat system was solid as always (although I didn't care for the random Fields of Fonons that altered character's skills) but it was difficult for me to find a single character I liked. The protagonist, Luke, was profoundly unlikable, and the amount of wordy technobabble in the dialogue was excessive even by Tales standards. The overly cutesy mascot Mieu was really just the icing on the cake. I almost wonder if I went into the game with the wrong mindset after hearing the reactions of other Tales fans to that game.
Sometime in between playing Symphonia and Abyss, I played a fair chunk of Tales of Phantasia for Super Famicom. A (somewhat flawed) fan translation had existed for the game for a number of years. Like all the series' early titles, Phantasia is completely 2D, with combat taking place in a sidescrolling fashion. The core gameplay is very similar to what the later 3D titles were doing, especially as far as skills and magic were concerned--except of course for the fact that combat frequently paused in order for more complex spell animations to play. I never did finish the SFC version of the game, but several years later (two years ago) I did decide to try the PS1 remake. It was never released in the US, but some industrious folks on the internet took it upon themselves to translate it. To my untrained eye, it was a far superior translation to the version I'd played quite some time before. I ended up enjoying it a lot and so moved on to Tales of Destiny right away.
Destiny was of course a total disappointment. It wasn't completely unplayable, but it was a step back technologically. It was less advanced because it was actually released before that particular version of Phantasia. It had more in common with the original SFC version than anything else. Basic attacks could not be strung together into combos, the cooking system was very simplistic and largely superfluous, and the characters were mostly pretty awful. The sound quality and music in general were also pretty bad--and don't get me started on the dungeons in the game's latter half. It is indisputably the worst Tales game I've played, but I can say the combat system was solid at the very least. It's certainly not a game I would ever play again, although I would be open to the idea of an enhanced remake!
Of course, when I originally started playing Tales of Destiny, I lost interest almost immediately. I attempted to enlist the help of my co-op partner to complete it, but technical difficulties barred the way. Much later, we discovered Mednafen and its far more stable PlayStation netplay--but by that point I'd already powered through the remainder of Destiny in an effort to clean out my backlog. That was way back in July. I'd originally briefly entertained the idea of starting Tales of Eternia after finishing Destiny, but I was determined to finish other games at that point--and I was also very soured on the Tales series. I wondered at the time if Symphonia (and Phantasia) were exceptions to a decidedly mediocre catalog of games.
Once my co-op partner and I finally did discover a more stable method for netplay, Tales of Eternia seemed like a no-brainer. I had finished Destiny and did not at all relish the thought of revisiting it. Fortuantely, Tales of Eternia improved on Destiny in just about every conceivable way. The characters were more interesting, the combat was more satisfying, and it had no talking swords. It was not without its fair share of annoyances (Tales technobabble, occasionally annoying dungeon design) but overall it was a game I really enjoyed. It also helped considerably that Reid and Farah were both pretty fun and varied characters to control in combat. Of course, the pointlessness of Max and Chat as party members really did decrease the variety of party compositions considerably--but the characters they shove at you by default made up pretty much the perfect party anyway.
We completed Eternia in January. Although it wasn't the best Tales game I'd played, it was enough to restore my faith in the series. I felt sure that there were other games in the series worth playing. I started to feel that completionist urge to play and finish them all. Since then, I've finished two more games from the series and I'm working on a third as we speak--or write, I guess. More on those later, though, because they both have their fair share of interesting things to discuss.
Friday, March 6, 2015
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Boom!
I last wrote about Dragon Quest III almost a year ago, shortly after I'd finished the first two games in the series. I found I really enjoyed the format even though for years I'd be turned off by the idea that Dragon Quest was as generic a JRPG as there could possibly be. In some ways, this is true, but there is something to be said for the charm the series displays in its simplicity. There is a lot of fun to be had in Dragon Quest III traversing its many dungeons and uncovering its many hidden treasures, some of which may elude the player at first glance. As you progress through the game you'll uncover more and more items and equipment, including special keys that enable you to circumvent the locks that barred your progress before.
These features are not altogether different from those in the first two Dragon Quest titles. Where DQIII really distinguishes itself from its predecessors is the job class system. While the Hero has a static class, three (generic) party members can be recruited and assigned any of the game's seven classes. This is a slight variation on the previous year's Final Fantasy, in which a four person party could be created from any of its six classes. Of course, in that particular case, each class had its own unique upgrade--whereas Dragon Quest III handles things a little differently. Once characters reach level 20 and gain access to the Tower of Dharma, any of the generic character classes can freely change their profession to another of the available classes, although they must start at level 1. If in possession of the Book of Satori, one can change to a Sage, a strict upgrade to the Cleric and Wizard classes that can learn spells from both schools. It is possible to cycle through a number of classes to acquire skills and/or spells from the different classes to customize your characters to your preferences.
For instance, my final party featured a Thief that had gone through several levels as a Cleric. This resulted in a swift utility character with access to backup healing spells to support my Sage. Helpfully, Thieves have high MP growth, so casting these spells was never a problem for her. My monk stayed the same for the entire game mostly just because she was the primary damage dealer and had no reason to expand her repertoire. It is a job system that certainly lacks the complexity of a later RPGs, but it was an interesting twist on the established format at the time. I generally really enjoy job systems in RPGs and I feel Dragon Quest III's was done reasonably well, especially for the time.
I played a fan translation of the Super Famicom remake of the game, which added the Thief class and fleshed out a few of the existing classes. Merchants/Dealers gained a new set of skills exclusive to them as well. Aside from that, the graphics were updated to SNES standards and it's reasonable to assume several names were changed. I briefly considered playing the original NES version of the game, but I've generally made it a policy to play the "best" version of a game, whether or not that happens to be the most recent one. In this particular case, it seemed the SNES remake was very similar to the original version but with a more pleasing graphical style and extra content--so the choice was really rather easy.
All in all, Dragon Quest III is not the most remarkable or memorable game I've played, but I have to give it a little leeway considering the game's age. Even so, I had a fair amount of fun with it and will continue to play through the series. I've already finished the DS remake of Dragon Quest IV and liked it a lot (more on that soon). I'm not sure when I'll be continuing the series, but I think I'd like to finish up Etrian Odyssey (and possibly the second game as well) before I do so.
These features are not altogether different from those in the first two Dragon Quest titles. Where DQIII really distinguishes itself from its predecessors is the job class system. While the Hero has a static class, three (generic) party members can be recruited and assigned any of the game's seven classes. This is a slight variation on the previous year's Final Fantasy, in which a four person party could be created from any of its six classes. Of course, in that particular case, each class had its own unique upgrade--whereas Dragon Quest III handles things a little differently. Once characters reach level 20 and gain access to the Tower of Dharma, any of the generic character classes can freely change their profession to another of the available classes, although they must start at level 1. If in possession of the Book of Satori, one can change to a Sage, a strict upgrade to the Cleric and Wizard classes that can learn spells from both schools. It is possible to cycle through a number of classes to acquire skills and/or spells from the different classes to customize your characters to your preferences.
For instance, my final party featured a Thief that had gone through several levels as a Cleric. This resulted in a swift utility character with access to backup healing spells to support my Sage. Helpfully, Thieves have high MP growth, so casting these spells was never a problem for her. My monk stayed the same for the entire game mostly just because she was the primary damage dealer and had no reason to expand her repertoire. It is a job system that certainly lacks the complexity of a later RPGs, but it was an interesting twist on the established format at the time. I generally really enjoy job systems in RPGs and I feel Dragon Quest III's was done reasonably well, especially for the time.
I played a fan translation of the Super Famicom remake of the game, which added the Thief class and fleshed out a few of the existing classes. Merchants/Dealers gained a new set of skills exclusive to them as well. Aside from that, the graphics were updated to SNES standards and it's reasonable to assume several names were changed. I briefly considered playing the original NES version of the game, but I've generally made it a policy to play the "best" version of a game, whether or not that happens to be the most recent one. In this particular case, it seemed the SNES remake was very similar to the original version but with a more pleasing graphical style and extra content--so the choice was really rather easy.
All in all, Dragon Quest III is not the most remarkable or memorable game I've played, but I have to give it a little leeway considering the game's age. Even so, I had a fair amount of fun with it and will continue to play through the series. I've already finished the DS remake of Dragon Quest IV and liked it a lot (more on that soon). I'm not sure when I'll be continuing the series, but I think I'd like to finish up Etrian Odyssey (and possibly the second game as well) before I do so.
Wednesday, March 4, 2015
Crystal Blue
After my co-op partner and I finished Illusion of Gaia, the logical next step was Terranigma. I felt our method of switching out every so often and chatting about what we were experiencing was actually really fun. It made me consider things about the game that I might not have otherwise if I'd been playing alone--and again, I can't stress enough how much easier it is to play through these games when it becomes more of a social activity. That is not to say that Illusion of Gaia is a bad game--in fact, there were a lot of things I liked about it. Still, action RPGs typically don't resonate with me nearly as much as games of other genres and Illusion of Gaia is divorced from RPG elements rather more than many other games I've played.
Terranigma, third in Quintet's Soul Blazer trilogy, features several RPG elements that were notably absent from its immediate predecessor. A more traditional experience and leveling system is present and it is also possible to purchase equipment and items as one might expect in an RPG. The game is light on special skills, but the combat, while still simplistic, is much more fluid and satisfying. Dashing and jumping attacks exist, as well as simple combos. Ark, Terranigma's hero, wields a spear instead of a sword and unfortunately does not possess the ability to shapeshift. Still, boss fights and encounters in general feel much less button-mashy than in Illusion of Gaia even if the simplicity of combat and the clumsiness of the spell interface knock it down a few pegs.
Illusion of Gaia was a very linear game. In most cases, the primary objective was to get from Point A to Point B with very few sidepaths. Terranigma is much more free and open in this regard, with many optional objectives to complete that are entirely independent from the game's combat and dungeon-crawling gameplay. It is Ark's lofty goal to do no more than resurrect the world in bits and pieces. He'll find himself communicating with plants near the game's beginnings, soon followed by animals of all shapes and sizes. Once he resurrects humans, he finds that he can no longer communicate with animals--a fact that surely must leave him feeling a little hollow.
Terranigma's world map is in fact a rough replica of the real world. Ark visits such places as the Sahara, the North Pole, and obvious analogues to America and Great Britain. Quintet's hamfisted appropriation of American culture is actually pretty amusing. America's analogue is appropriately named Freedom and features a kitschy folk theme and an "ethnically diverse" populace. Freedom, like many other towns in Terranigma, will grow and expand over the course of the game if the player takes the correct actions. Ark will need to traverse the globe and assist great inventors, bolster international trade and tourism, all while vanquishing an ancient evil in his free time. It's a very interesting formula that I can't personally recall being repeated. I'm sure I'm forgetting other games that feature similar elements (and in fact there are likely quite a few I haven't played) but Terranigma's execution of these elements is quite good, especially for an SNES game.
Many RPGs feature a single town that grows and expands at the player's behest. Breath of Fire II, Dragon Quest IV, and Tales of Vesperia spring to mind just out of games I've played recently, but I can't recall any that focus on that aspect of the gameplay to such a degree. Terranigma is a game in which the player must rebuild the world. This is much more satisfying than in games like Legend of Mana and Final Fantasy Tactics Advance where you're simply plopping down landmasses on a grid. In Terranigma, you're resurrecting history, advancing civilization. It's a very interesting structure and I'd be very eager to play a more modern game with a similar format.
Terranigma, third in Quintet's Soul Blazer trilogy, features several RPG elements that were notably absent from its immediate predecessor. A more traditional experience and leveling system is present and it is also possible to purchase equipment and items as one might expect in an RPG. The game is light on special skills, but the combat, while still simplistic, is much more fluid and satisfying. Dashing and jumping attacks exist, as well as simple combos. Ark, Terranigma's hero, wields a spear instead of a sword and unfortunately does not possess the ability to shapeshift. Still, boss fights and encounters in general feel much less button-mashy than in Illusion of Gaia even if the simplicity of combat and the clumsiness of the spell interface knock it down a few pegs.
Illusion of Gaia was a very linear game. In most cases, the primary objective was to get from Point A to Point B with very few sidepaths. Terranigma is much more free and open in this regard, with many optional objectives to complete that are entirely independent from the game's combat and dungeon-crawling gameplay. It is Ark's lofty goal to do no more than resurrect the world in bits and pieces. He'll find himself communicating with plants near the game's beginnings, soon followed by animals of all shapes and sizes. Once he resurrects humans, he finds that he can no longer communicate with animals--a fact that surely must leave him feeling a little hollow.
Terranigma's world map is in fact a rough replica of the real world. Ark visits such places as the Sahara, the North Pole, and obvious analogues to America and Great Britain. Quintet's hamfisted appropriation of American culture is actually pretty amusing. America's analogue is appropriately named Freedom and features a kitschy folk theme and an "ethnically diverse" populace. Freedom, like many other towns in Terranigma, will grow and expand over the course of the game if the player takes the correct actions. Ark will need to traverse the globe and assist great inventors, bolster international trade and tourism, all while vanquishing an ancient evil in his free time. It's a very interesting formula that I can't personally recall being repeated. I'm sure I'm forgetting other games that feature similar elements (and in fact there are likely quite a few I haven't played) but Terranigma's execution of these elements is quite good, especially for an SNES game.
Many RPGs feature a single town that grows and expands at the player's behest. Breath of Fire II, Dragon Quest IV, and Tales of Vesperia spring to mind just out of games I've played recently, but I can't recall any that focus on that aspect of the gameplay to such a degree. Terranigma is a game in which the player must rebuild the world. This is much more satisfying than in games like Legend of Mana and Final Fantasy Tactics Advance where you're simply plopping down landmasses on a grid. In Terranigma, you're resurrecting history, advancing civilization. It's a very interesting structure and I'd be very eager to play a more modern game with a similar format.
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
The Nazca Constellation
Had I continued my trend of daily updates for this blog, I feel it's inevitable I would have discussed every single game I was playing along the way. Because I did not continue that trend, many of these games have not so much as elicited a single mention in my entries. In fact, the only game I've played this year that has received significant coverage is Persona Q and even then the vast majority of my playtime for that game was from 2014. My review for Breath of Fire II was also published this year, but I finished it back in December. I haven't decided yet whether I'll continue writing those long form reviews, but I certainly have decided that I'm going to resume updating this blog in general.
Let's take a look back, then, at the games I completed in January and February. First on the list was Persona Q, which I've already discussed in some detail, but shortly after that I played through the SNES classic Illusion of Gaia with my co-op partner. Now, Illusion of Gaia is not a multiplayer game, but having mostly run out of co-op SNES games to play, my co-op partner and I decided it might be fun to play through something single player and take turns. It's something I've done a few times in the past, although mostly with games I've played to completion before. I remember fondly playing games like Chrono Trigger, Final Fantasy V, and Final Fantasy VI online through ZSNES with old internet pals--but Illusion of Gaia was different because we were both experiencing it for the first time.
My original suggestion was to start with Soul Blazer, first in a trilogy that included Illusion of Gaia and Terranigma by developer Quintet. My co-op partner vetoed that idea because he'd watched much of a Let's Play of the game that made the gameplay seem very basic and uninteresting. Reluctantly, I agreed to start with Illusion of Gaia. It was, after all, a game I'd been meaning to sit down and play for many years. Without my co-op partner's assistance, I may not have had the motivation to do so.
Illusion of Gaia is an action RPG in the tradition of Zelda II. It frequently feels very much like a sidescrolling game of that era even though segments where free range of movement is available are common. The RPG elements are light, although there is a reasonable emphasis on plot and characters. Common traits like levels and experience are strangely absent, replaced by a system in which vanquishing all the foes in a particular area will reward you with a boost to a certain stat. The gameplay itself is simplistic and largely boils down to spamming the attack button while the protagonist, Will, smacks people with a flute of all things. Will does acquire a variety of special skills on his way, principal of which is the ability to shapeshift into one of two powerful alternate forms.
At the beginning of Will's journey, it's revealed just about right away that he has telekinetic powers. These powers are never used for combat, but instead for minor puzzles along the way--and also to snag distant treasures dropped by defeated enemies. These mysterious powers were apparently granted to Will after a visit to an ancient tower with his father Olman (Old Man?) some time ago--an event for which he retains no memories. Along his journey, Will and his crew of friends (called the Seaside Gang) will discover the nature of those events at the tower and come to terms with the evil threatening to engulf the world.
Of course, Will's friends serve only as moral support as they have no actual impact on the gameplay. Will finds himself alone for the entirety of his travels in dungeons that serve as analogues to real world historical locations. One dungeon takes place in an ancient pyramid, for instance, while another on the Great Wall of China. Terranigma features similar real world locations, but under the guise of resurrecting a dead world. In Illusion of Gaia it makes less sense, although I'll be the first to admit my memory of the game is fading a tad.
Illusion of Gaia features a lot of interesting characters and a plot that is strange and largely incomprehensible. It has simple gameplay albeit with an interesting shapeshifting component--and extremely challenging (often frustrating) bosses. It's a game I'd recommend to any SNES enthusiast, but I couldn't strongly recommend it for any other reason. It's sequel, Terranigma, is the superior game and it's pretty likely I'll talk about it soon.
Let's take a look back, then, at the games I completed in January and February. First on the list was Persona Q, which I've already discussed in some detail, but shortly after that I played through the SNES classic Illusion of Gaia with my co-op partner. Now, Illusion of Gaia is not a multiplayer game, but having mostly run out of co-op SNES games to play, my co-op partner and I decided it might be fun to play through something single player and take turns. It's something I've done a few times in the past, although mostly with games I've played to completion before. I remember fondly playing games like Chrono Trigger, Final Fantasy V, and Final Fantasy VI online through ZSNES with old internet pals--but Illusion of Gaia was different because we were both experiencing it for the first time.
My original suggestion was to start with Soul Blazer, first in a trilogy that included Illusion of Gaia and Terranigma by developer Quintet. My co-op partner vetoed that idea because he'd watched much of a Let's Play of the game that made the gameplay seem very basic and uninteresting. Reluctantly, I agreed to start with Illusion of Gaia. It was, after all, a game I'd been meaning to sit down and play for many years. Without my co-op partner's assistance, I may not have had the motivation to do so.
Illusion of Gaia is an action RPG in the tradition of Zelda II. It frequently feels very much like a sidescrolling game of that era even though segments where free range of movement is available are common. The RPG elements are light, although there is a reasonable emphasis on plot and characters. Common traits like levels and experience are strangely absent, replaced by a system in which vanquishing all the foes in a particular area will reward you with a boost to a certain stat. The gameplay itself is simplistic and largely boils down to spamming the attack button while the protagonist, Will, smacks people with a flute of all things. Will does acquire a variety of special skills on his way, principal of which is the ability to shapeshift into one of two powerful alternate forms.
At the beginning of Will's journey, it's revealed just about right away that he has telekinetic powers. These powers are never used for combat, but instead for minor puzzles along the way--and also to snag distant treasures dropped by defeated enemies. These mysterious powers were apparently granted to Will after a visit to an ancient tower with his father Olman (Old Man?) some time ago--an event for which he retains no memories. Along his journey, Will and his crew of friends (called the Seaside Gang) will discover the nature of those events at the tower and come to terms with the evil threatening to engulf the world.
Of course, Will's friends serve only as moral support as they have no actual impact on the gameplay. Will finds himself alone for the entirety of his travels in dungeons that serve as analogues to real world historical locations. One dungeon takes place in an ancient pyramid, for instance, while another on the Great Wall of China. Terranigma features similar real world locations, but under the guise of resurrecting a dead world. In Illusion of Gaia it makes less sense, although I'll be the first to admit my memory of the game is fading a tad.
Illusion of Gaia features a lot of interesting characters and a plot that is strange and largely incomprehensible. It has simple gameplay albeit with an interesting shapeshifting component--and extremely challenging (often frustrating) bosses. It's a game I'd recommend to any SNES enthusiast, but I couldn't strongly recommend it for any other reason. It's sequel, Terranigma, is the superior game and it's pretty likely I'll talk about it soon.
Monday, March 2, 2015
Beginnings
I find myself consumed with a bone-deep weariness unlike anything I've experienced over the past year or so. It reminds me a lot of when I used to work at Walmart some time ago--a position that required me to be on my feet for the span of an eight hour shift. For almost a year now, I've had the good fortune of having a job that allows me to stay seated in front of a computer. However, the store's being remodeled soon. In this new store design, sales associates such as myself will be expected to stand in front of raised monitors, ostensibly to appear more inviting to potential customers. I might have dreaded this change a few months ago, but now that it's coming closer, I find myself welcoming it. I've lived far too sedentary a life over the past several months. Being put in a position where I'm required to stand up and walk around every day can only help me achieve my fitness goals. I've been declining to sit in my chair during the past few days of work in preparation for this change. It's been unexpectedly tiring.
I'm not in great shape. I'm losing weight, but I'm still getting very little exercise. This is something I'm working on changing. I'd originally planned to do some basic workouts tonight, but I'm so exhausted that I've abandoned the idea entirely. An impromptu trip to my cousin's place resulted in playing drums for a good hour or so. That level of strenuous activity combined with being on my feet all day has left me rather more tired than I'd expected to be. It's good though--I'm glad to be tired and I'm glad that my muscles ache, because it signifies a beginning for me. It lets me know that I'm burning calories. So long as I don't use this weariness as an excuse to stay inactive in the coming days, it's nothing but a good thing.
I didn't get as many calories today as I probably should have, but I ate more than enough to satisfy my hunger--and that's really all I can do. I've been eating two somewhat large meals a day lately because it's difficult to find the time in the mornings for breakfast. That would mean waking up early and I'm already uncomfortable with waking up at 7:45 as I have been. I love the idea of fruit smoothies for breakfast but it sort of clashes with my ritual morning coffee. I guess I could do both but it sounds awkward. Even if I prepare the smoothie the night beforehand, it's unlikely I'd have enough time in the morning to consume the smoothie before heading out the door. Even then, I typically end up taking lunch at 11. It seems pointless to eat before heading to work when I'm going to be eating so soon into my shift anyway.
I should make a bunch of smoothies and just have them ready at work. Yeah. Good idea.
I think I've decided I'm going to drop some kind of update on my weight every Saturday on this blog with thoughts on how my diet/exercise regimen is going. I can only hope my entries in the future will be less scatterbrained than this one. My weariness is due in no small part to my increased activity level lately--that's true. But beyond that, I also haven't been getting as much sleep and I think there's a variety of reasons why. I've had a lot on my mind--plans, aspirations, worries, the usual fare. Combine that with a sudden dramatic change in temperature and surroundings (I cleaned up a bit) and you have restless sleep. Hopefully that problem will clear itself up over time.
I'm not in great shape. I'm losing weight, but I'm still getting very little exercise. This is something I'm working on changing. I'd originally planned to do some basic workouts tonight, but I'm so exhausted that I've abandoned the idea entirely. An impromptu trip to my cousin's place resulted in playing drums for a good hour or so. That level of strenuous activity combined with being on my feet all day has left me rather more tired than I'd expected to be. It's good though--I'm glad to be tired and I'm glad that my muscles ache, because it signifies a beginning for me. It lets me know that I'm burning calories. So long as I don't use this weariness as an excuse to stay inactive in the coming days, it's nothing but a good thing.
I didn't get as many calories today as I probably should have, but I ate more than enough to satisfy my hunger--and that's really all I can do. I've been eating two somewhat large meals a day lately because it's difficult to find the time in the mornings for breakfast. That would mean waking up early and I'm already uncomfortable with waking up at 7:45 as I have been. I love the idea of fruit smoothies for breakfast but it sort of clashes with my ritual morning coffee. I guess I could do both but it sounds awkward. Even if I prepare the smoothie the night beforehand, it's unlikely I'd have enough time in the morning to consume the smoothie before heading out the door. Even then, I typically end up taking lunch at 11. It seems pointless to eat before heading to work when I'm going to be eating so soon into my shift anyway.
I should make a bunch of smoothies and just have them ready at work. Yeah. Good idea.
I think I've decided I'm going to drop some kind of update on my weight every Saturday on this blog with thoughts on how my diet/exercise regimen is going. I can only hope my entries in the future will be less scatterbrained than this one. My weariness is due in no small part to my increased activity level lately--that's true. But beyond that, I also haven't been getting as much sleep and I think there's a variety of reasons why. I've had a lot on my mind--plans, aspirations, worries, the usual fare. Combine that with a sudden dramatic change in temperature and surroundings (I cleaned up a bit) and you have restless sleep. Hopefully that problem will clear itself up over time.
Sunday, March 1, 2015
These entries weren't meant to be once a month
Yikes, it's been almost a month since I've written an entry. This was certainly not my original plan when I decided to stop updating daily. I can make excuse after excuse that I've abandoned quantity for quality, but that statement rings false to my ears. I'm proud of the reviews I wrote in January, but February only saw one entry lamenting the fact that I was not writing--much like this one, in fact. Why do I so often let laziness get the better of me, to prevent me from doing those things I'd very much like to do?
Of course, I haven't been entirely unproductive with my time. I've been adhering reasonably closely to my vegetarian diet for what must be three months now. On January 24th, I purchased a scale and started keeping track of my weight weekly. After a month's time, I lost 13 pounds. For my most recent weigh-in, I gained a pound back--so I've decided to redouble my efforts. Although I had been making a concerted effort to eat healthy, I'd not given much thought to my portions or calorie content. From now on--or until I develop better instinctive judgment--I'm keeping track of my calorie intake with a general goal of coming in at around 1800 calories per day. It might seem somewhat ambitious to track my weight loss every week, but until Saturday, I was consistently losing 3-4 pounds every time. I mean to continue that track record. If I reach yet another plateau, I'll have to again up the ante.
I haven't yet taken the plunge into adhering to rigorous regular workouts, but I imagine I will have to do so soon. I'm in quite miserable shape even disregarding my weight. At this point I can't even manage 10 push-ups. Only a few years ago, I could easily crank out 20 push-ups per day. I can only guess as to why I didn't continue to ramp up the intensity of that particular workout, but I feel sure my tendency toward laziness and apathy must have had something to do with it. My motivation comes in fits and spurts--and I'm easily sidetracked and discouraged by events in my life.
Aside from my new weight loss goal, I've been playing and completing video games at as breakneck a pace as ever. I've already completed 10 games this year, which puts me well on track to break last year's record of 35 assuming I can continue my current trend. Several of those games were completed with the assistance of my co-op partner. For the first time ever, we played a game together while in the same room. It was also the first time in some years that I ventured out of my home and spent time with a friend in person regularly. I think this trend may well continue, assuming we can find something else to play.
I think my contentment level depends on a variety of factors. I know what most of these factors are, but I so frequently fail to insure that my needs are met because it involves effort on my part. It is important to me to be comfortable in my own surroundings and that part of my life is definitely improving. After months of living in miserable cold, I've finally acquired a propane heater. No longer must I hide under a mountain of blankets and wear layers simply to approach some level of comfort in my own home. However, the house is still mostly a mess and I have not put forth the level of effort required to make it feel livable even though I know it would make me significantly more comfortable and happy. Similarly, I have not put forth the effort required to regularly update this blog. It's not about writing something for others to read. It's about writing something to write something.
Of course, I haven't been entirely unproductive with my time. I've been adhering reasonably closely to my vegetarian diet for what must be three months now. On January 24th, I purchased a scale and started keeping track of my weight weekly. After a month's time, I lost 13 pounds. For my most recent weigh-in, I gained a pound back--so I've decided to redouble my efforts. Although I had been making a concerted effort to eat healthy, I'd not given much thought to my portions or calorie content. From now on--or until I develop better instinctive judgment--I'm keeping track of my calorie intake with a general goal of coming in at around 1800 calories per day. It might seem somewhat ambitious to track my weight loss every week, but until Saturday, I was consistently losing 3-4 pounds every time. I mean to continue that track record. If I reach yet another plateau, I'll have to again up the ante.
I haven't yet taken the plunge into adhering to rigorous regular workouts, but I imagine I will have to do so soon. I'm in quite miserable shape even disregarding my weight. At this point I can't even manage 10 push-ups. Only a few years ago, I could easily crank out 20 push-ups per day. I can only guess as to why I didn't continue to ramp up the intensity of that particular workout, but I feel sure my tendency toward laziness and apathy must have had something to do with it. My motivation comes in fits and spurts--and I'm easily sidetracked and discouraged by events in my life.
Aside from my new weight loss goal, I've been playing and completing video games at as breakneck a pace as ever. I've already completed 10 games this year, which puts me well on track to break last year's record of 35 assuming I can continue my current trend. Several of those games were completed with the assistance of my co-op partner. For the first time ever, we played a game together while in the same room. It was also the first time in some years that I ventured out of my home and spent time with a friend in person regularly. I think this trend may well continue, assuming we can find something else to play.
I think my contentment level depends on a variety of factors. I know what most of these factors are, but I so frequently fail to insure that my needs are met because it involves effort on my part. It is important to me to be comfortable in my own surroundings and that part of my life is definitely improving. After months of living in miserable cold, I've finally acquired a propane heater. No longer must I hide under a mountain of blankets and wear layers simply to approach some level of comfort in my own home. However, the house is still mostly a mess and I have not put forth the level of effort required to make it feel livable even though I know it would make me significantly more comfortable and happy. Similarly, I have not put forth the effort required to regularly update this blog. It's not about writing something for others to read. It's about writing something to write something.
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
I'm still here
I've found myself experiencing many a moment of anxiety at work lately--and not just for the usual reasons. I frequently feel uncomfortable for reasons concerning my body image, my distaste for being around large groups of strangers, and my obligation to engage with these people and sell them things they most likely don't actually need. It's more than that, though. I've felt anxious because I haven't been expressing myself. I told myself that if I stopped updating this blog every day it would only be because of a restructuring of the format and that I was going to give up on being creative and expressive--and to be fair, I did crank out a couple of exhaustively detailed reviews. I'm proud of them, but I've found myself spending considerably more time playing video games lately than writing about them.
I've become consumed with the desire to outdo myself, with the desire to play as many games as possible over the course of this year--and that's fine. But if I'm doing that, I should be profiting from that creatively as well. At first I was taking a lot of notes on the games I was playing, whispering promises to myself that I'd compile these notes into enormous drafts from which I'd cull serviceably written reflections on the games in question. It worked for Breath of Fire II and Persona Q so I figured it wouldn't be difficult to continue the process. I know I'm capable of doing that, but for whatever reason, I've not followed through. I finished Illusion of Gaia and Terranigma earlier in January and took reasonably detailed notes on those games--but we're in February now and the events of those games is already fading from my tenuous memory.
It's clear that I have issues with staying motivated, even when it comes to things that I really honestly enjoy and want to do. I think that's why this semi-recent trend of making an earnest effort to fully complete each game I play has been such a refreshing things for me in my life--because at least there's one thing on which I can concentrate, on which I can focus and see through to completion. But that's not enough, is it? There are so many other things in my life on which I need to buckle down and see through to completion. I'll make miniscule progress on these things here and there but invariably I stumble and find myself succumbing once again to apathy. That's not acceptable and I have to take decisive steps toward correcting that aspect of myself.
I sometimes wonder if the only solution to these problems is to rigorously schedule the majority of my time in an effort to insure what needs to be done is done. I've made attempts. I've started entering things into Google Calendar on my phone but even now I find myself drifting from those tasks.
I've become a vegetarian--not for moral reasons, necessarily. It's more of an experiment than anything else and there are a variety of reasons why I feel it's a good idea and has so far been a pretty positive experience. I've noticed in the past that meat has negative effects on me, particularly when it comes to red meat. I love meat and even now a couple of months into my new diet I'll find myself craving burgers or hot dogs, or even just some healthy grilled chicken. It's worth noting, though, that I do find myself with more energy in general. I don't feel as sluggish after eating and I don't feel as I did before that I need meat to feel as if I'd had a proper meal. Furthermore, the diet has provoked me to be more creative with what I eat and to experience flavors that are decidedly different from what I'm used to. It's too early to say if this is a permanent lifestyle change for me, but I'm so far pleased with the results of my experiment.
Of course, I'm also partially motivated by the fact that I want to lose weight. I want to lose a lot of weight. I'm a good fifty pounds overweight and I think my overwhelmingly negative body image and paralyzing anxiety issues are rooted in that. I'm not so naive to believe that getting fit will eradicate those problems, but it can only help. It's also very helpful to invest myself in something that is difficult and requires discipline. I'm sad to say I haven't been nearly as diligent about exercising as I should be, but I can at least accurately report that my diet has been extremely consistent. There are a few areas on which I should definitely do some work, but I've eaten no meat whatsoever for a couple months now and I never eat fast food or drink soda. If I can somehow curb my insufferable Red Bull habit I think I'll be in a good spot. Exercise is also a must, but considering how inhumanly cold it's been lately, I've been struggling with the prospect of rising from my couch.
I think I'm frequently reluctant to write because I'm not satisfied with my place in life and I feel I lack the power to change that. But that's a cop-out. It may be difficult to change my life, but it's something that can be done, and it's always worth writing about--even if all I have to talk about is a video game I'm playing. I'll never be too old for video games and I can't envision myself losing my passion for them--but I can't deny that I frequently find myself feeling a little ambivalent about this hobby on which I spend so much of my time. I'm twenty-seven years old and I play more video games these days than I ever have. Many of my peers have "grown out" of this habit but still I find myself invested and genuinely passionate about the pastime. When I hear about others who try to play games and can't find the joy in it they once did, it makes me really sad, not just because I wish they could experience what I do, but because I'm also subconsciously a little worried it won't always have that same spark for me.
These things happen organically, though. Even if I do lose interest it won't be the end of the world--so long as I can find something about which I'm passionate. I've found myself losing interest in music over the past year or so and the very idea of that would have made me very sad not so long ago--but these things happen. I would only be concerned if there was nothing in which I could cite a genuine interest and I just don't think that'll ever be the case. I have too much of an obsessive personality not to take hold of the things that interest me. I have to strive to do something with that interest though, to reach out and share it with others--or just with the void, with that empty vacuum of the internet.
I've become consumed with the desire to outdo myself, with the desire to play as many games as possible over the course of this year--and that's fine. But if I'm doing that, I should be profiting from that creatively as well. At first I was taking a lot of notes on the games I was playing, whispering promises to myself that I'd compile these notes into enormous drafts from which I'd cull serviceably written reflections on the games in question. It worked for Breath of Fire II and Persona Q so I figured it wouldn't be difficult to continue the process. I know I'm capable of doing that, but for whatever reason, I've not followed through. I finished Illusion of Gaia and Terranigma earlier in January and took reasonably detailed notes on those games--but we're in February now and the events of those games is already fading from my tenuous memory.
It's clear that I have issues with staying motivated, even when it comes to things that I really honestly enjoy and want to do. I think that's why this semi-recent trend of making an earnest effort to fully complete each game I play has been such a refreshing things for me in my life--because at least there's one thing on which I can concentrate, on which I can focus and see through to completion. But that's not enough, is it? There are so many other things in my life on which I need to buckle down and see through to completion. I'll make miniscule progress on these things here and there but invariably I stumble and find myself succumbing once again to apathy. That's not acceptable and I have to take decisive steps toward correcting that aspect of myself.
I sometimes wonder if the only solution to these problems is to rigorously schedule the majority of my time in an effort to insure what needs to be done is done. I've made attempts. I've started entering things into Google Calendar on my phone but even now I find myself drifting from those tasks.
I've become a vegetarian--not for moral reasons, necessarily. It's more of an experiment than anything else and there are a variety of reasons why I feel it's a good idea and has so far been a pretty positive experience. I've noticed in the past that meat has negative effects on me, particularly when it comes to red meat. I love meat and even now a couple of months into my new diet I'll find myself craving burgers or hot dogs, or even just some healthy grilled chicken. It's worth noting, though, that I do find myself with more energy in general. I don't feel as sluggish after eating and I don't feel as I did before that I need meat to feel as if I'd had a proper meal. Furthermore, the diet has provoked me to be more creative with what I eat and to experience flavors that are decidedly different from what I'm used to. It's too early to say if this is a permanent lifestyle change for me, but I'm so far pleased with the results of my experiment.
Of course, I'm also partially motivated by the fact that I want to lose weight. I want to lose a lot of weight. I'm a good fifty pounds overweight and I think my overwhelmingly negative body image and paralyzing anxiety issues are rooted in that. I'm not so naive to believe that getting fit will eradicate those problems, but it can only help. It's also very helpful to invest myself in something that is difficult and requires discipline. I'm sad to say I haven't been nearly as diligent about exercising as I should be, but I can at least accurately report that my diet has been extremely consistent. There are a few areas on which I should definitely do some work, but I've eaten no meat whatsoever for a couple months now and I never eat fast food or drink soda. If I can somehow curb my insufferable Red Bull habit I think I'll be in a good spot. Exercise is also a must, but considering how inhumanly cold it's been lately, I've been struggling with the prospect of rising from my couch.
I think I'm frequently reluctant to write because I'm not satisfied with my place in life and I feel I lack the power to change that. But that's a cop-out. It may be difficult to change my life, but it's something that can be done, and it's always worth writing about--even if all I have to talk about is a video game I'm playing. I'll never be too old for video games and I can't envision myself losing my passion for them--but I can't deny that I frequently find myself feeling a little ambivalent about this hobby on which I spend so much of my time. I'm twenty-seven years old and I play more video games these days than I ever have. Many of my peers have "grown out" of this habit but still I find myself invested and genuinely passionate about the pastime. When I hear about others who try to play games and can't find the joy in it they once did, it makes me really sad, not just because I wish they could experience what I do, but because I'm also subconsciously a little worried it won't always have that same spark for me.
These things happen organically, though. Even if I do lose interest it won't be the end of the world--so long as I can find something about which I'm passionate. I've found myself losing interest in music over the past year or so and the very idea of that would have made me very sad not so long ago--but these things happen. I would only be concerned if there was nothing in which I could cite a genuine interest and I just don't think that'll ever be the case. I have too much of an obsessive personality not to take hold of the things that interest me. I have to strive to do something with that interest though, to reach out and share it with others--or just with the void, with that empty vacuum of the internet.
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