I've been thinking a lot lately about how I approach video games, about how I bend them to my will so that I can create the "right" kind of experience. It brings to mind my first playthrough of Elden Ring, where I had a very particular idea of how the game was supposed to be played and stuck to that ideal slavishly, even as the game heaped more and more options upon me. It also applies to my recent 200+ hour playthrough of Fire Emblem Engage, which I have now—mercifully—finished as of tonight.
As soon as Engage presented me with a list of difficulty options, I knew that I was going to go for the hardest difficulty. I'm a veteran, after all. I have played and finished a version of every Fire Emblem in the main series aside from the fourth and fifth entries, which only have limited fan translations. I have expressed on many occasions that Fire Emblem is at its best when adhering to its classic formula of limited resources and permanent deaths for your fallen allies. Every decision means something. Every movement carries tension. At any moment, you could lose one of your trusted allies and you have to make the choice of whether or not you try again, or you carry on. Of course, for me, the choice is always simple. I won't let anyone die. Well, not yet, at least.
Fire Emblem Engage has some of the best gameplay and strategy in the entire series. I don't say this lightly. Reception for this game has been mixed, especially by those expecting more of the simulation aspects and political machinations of Fire Emblem Three Houses. This is certainly not that. Engage is much more silly, more colorful. Despite that, its gameplay is significantly more complex. Whereas Three Houses focused intensely on customization and the development of your characters through the training they received at Garreg Mach Monastery, Engage presents you with a series of characters with disparate strategic niches who can be outfitted with Emblem Rings to either enhance their existing strengths or cover their weaknesses. The crucial difference here is that you need to decide which characters get which Emblem Rings—and that choice is a big part of what makes the strategy of Fire Emblem Engage so satisfying.
I played Engage on Maddening difficulty, which proved to be so much more of an ordeal than I ever expected it to be. I had to put every ounce of strategic knowhow to use and even then, found myself spending multiple hours on just about every mission past the first few. It was exhausting enough that even though I found myself enjoying the game immensely, I had to take breaks after each session because it wasn't what I'd call a relaxing experience. Fulfilling, sure, but not relaxing.
In between sessions, I regularly played Elden Ring for the second time since it came out a little over a year ago. This time felt so much more exciting for me because I was playing it in relay fashion with a friend. We would assign each other weapons and spells and take turns conquering various bosses. Some sessions were very short and some took several hours. Some weapons ended up being a lot more fun and powerful than we expected, but of course, others didn't quite live up to our expectations. We also had to reconcile our different approaches to the game. I tend to prefer forgoing a shield for two-handing or dual-wielding weapons and tend not to put too much stock in armor at all since I'd rather just be able to dodge more effectively. My friend, on the other hand, is a much safer player, and focused on getting a shield with as much stability as possible during his first playthrough.
In the early stages of our relay run, we focused on assigning each other play styles that might be new and unusual to us, but we naturally started to shift toward our preferred methods over time, especially as bosses got harder and harder. The joy of exploration and experimentation in the early- to mid-game gave way to some brutally grueling sessions that were mostly just hours of slamming into a brick wall of a tough boss with a weapon that one of us just wasn't that comfortable with. Again, these sessions were often fulfilling, but not usually relaxing.
So it was that over the past month or so, I relegated a lot of my free time to playing games that were stressing me out. I didn't go into either of these experiences with the intent of this happening, but once I was in, I certainly wasn't going to shut it down. In the past week or so, most of our Elden Ring sessions were taking yet another stab at the gauntlet of difficult bosses at the end of game. At the same time, I was making attempts at the final two missions of Fire Emblem Engage, both of which clocked in at around four hours.
The thing is, I could have made both of these experiences significantly less stressful for me. I could have lowered the difficulty of Fire Emblem at any time. I could have loosened the limitations I was setting on our Elden Ring run as well, but I'm always so concerned about preserving the purity of the experience. It's hard to say if it's worth it. I'm very glad that I've finished both of these games, but I'm absolutely going to be taking it easy for a little while going forward. I don't want to spend 200 hours on the next game I play, no matter how much I like it.
